The BioShock Demo and Me

So, always being slow, I finally got around to downloading the "BioShock" demo. Yes yes, I know it's out in the States (Aug 21st, 2007), but I'm not big on this sort of game since I'm a chicken. When I watch scary movies (and I love watching them), I can't go to the bathroom by myself--I kidnap a cat or a friend to escort me--it's pathetic, really. Most recently, "F.E.A.R." similarly incapacitated me, but before that, all those fuckin' "Silent Hill"s and "Clock Tower"s really fucked me up. I mean, baby midgets with knives stabbing the backs of your legs!? Eww.

So, here's the story straight from the horse's mouth:

BioShock is the "genetically enhanced" first person shooter that lets you do things never before possible in the genre: turn everything into a weapon, biologically mod your body with plasmids, hack devices and systems, upgrade your weapons and craft new ammo variants, and experiment with different battle techniques in an incredible and unique underwater city.

You are a cast-away in Rapture, an underwater Utopia torn apart by civil war. Caught between powerful forces, and hunted down by genetically modified “splicers” and deadly security systems, you have to come to grips with a deadly, mysterious world filled with powerful technology and fascinating characters. No encounter ever plays out the same, and no two gamers will play the game the same way.

BioShock is loaded with some of greatest, most modifiable weapons to ever blast their way into a shooter. But guns alone won’t be enough to defeat the devious AIs of Rapture. There are literally hundreds of other strategies players can use to take out his enemies. Here’s just a few things you can do a foe:

* Catch his Grenades in Mid Air and Toss Them Back at Him
* Freeze Him Solid and Shatter Him with Smack of your Wrench
* Lead him and his comrades to water and Zap them all with 1000 Volts
* Burn Him Up With Home-Made Molotov Cocktails
* Booby Trap Healing Machines and Watch Them Blow up IN his Face
* Brainwash Him to Become Your Personal Body Guard
* Invent your own Ammo Types to Prey on his Vulnerabilities
* Turn his own Security System Against Him
* Light Him on Fire and Launch Heat Seeking Missiles At him
* Torment Him with Plagues of Insects
* Take Research Photos of Him to Learn his Weaknesses
* Send Him Flying into the Ceiling to Knock him Senseless

No encounter ever plays out the same way twice. No two gamers will ever play BioShock the same way.

Ahhh, so yeah, what they said. And yes, it's fun, and yes, I was freaked the fuck out wondering when and what would come out and kill me. I definitely recommend trying it out (the demo is 1.85 gigs, but it goes fast if you use GameShack or something) to see for yourself. As for whether or not I'll purchase it...probably not--I'm too chicken, but I'll certainly have GameFly send me a copy to play on the XBox.)